Hump Day!

Official count down calendar - Circled day at the end is the

very last day I could get home - Dec 23rd.

     The Navy is purposely vague on many things.  I've learned to deal with this, however it continues to be a problem that vexes me.  Currently, the problem lies with the actual duration of our mission here.  When I first got assigned for these orders I was told I would be deploying for six months.  No problem, standard deployment (although there are many, many others who do more - some in upwards of 18 months).  Then I was told that I would have to process for a week in Norfolk.  SOP, got it.  Oh yeah, there will be three to four weeks of training to get you ready for the environment you are going to be working in.  No problem, good idea.  Then there will be 5-7 days of travel to places like Maine, Germany, and Kuwait, where you will acclimate to the 125 degree heat.  Now wait just a minute.
     Anyway, I totaled up the time and it should be around 7 months or 210 days.  Then I picked up my orders and they said:  duration of orders  - 242 days.  WTF!  Where did the extra month come from?  I have no idea and no one else really knows either.  I've come to the conclusion that they build in extra time to have some flexibility for any contingency - or that they hate me for the time I was drunk and did a skit making fun of my chairman at the end of the year awards dinner.   Either way, I'm OK with that, however it's always nice to have a date to hang your hat on, to count down the days you have until you come home.  After running numerous scenarios in my head, I've finally come up with an estimated return home.  And this marks the official (arbitrary) halfway point!  I think.  I'm very non-committal on this statement if you couldn't tell.

In an effort to count down the days of deployments, people use a variety of methods.  I, personally, have a count down calendar (above).  I also have a visual cue from the huge bottle of anti-malarial pills that I was issued (190).  Finally, I've picked a number of dates to 'look forward to', as a way of passing the days.  Here are some examples:

May 1st - Duh, day 1. 
May 21st - Anniversary.
May 28th - Arrive in Kuwait.
June 2nd - Arrive at Bastion.
July 4th - Dress up as a minute man and sing 'Yankee Doodle Dandy' to annoy the Brits.
August 10th - My buddy Jason arrives in Kuwait.
August 25th - My buddies George and Edton get to go home and Dave arrives.  And Hump Day?
September 8th - Opening day of Football Season.
September 16th - Phillies lock up the NL East.
October 15th - Entire British command changes over.
October 23rd - Eagles start season 7 and 0.  And Phillies beat the Red Sox in a sweep in the World Series.
October 31st - Halloween - Dress up as a minute man and sing 'Yankee Doodle Dandy'. Yes it is still funny a second time.
November 10th - Average high temperature in Bastion finally drops below 100 every day.
November 23rd - Marks 180 days Boots on Ground.
December 1st - Marks 8 months of tax free pay.
December 7th - Day 194.  Should be official 'rip out' date of Nobel Eagle number 4608, meaning I should be leaving for Kuwait this day.
December 23rd - Latest day I could return.

As with all things, time will tell.  The only date that I'm positively, absolutely, 100% sure about is.....






The Phillies will crush the Red Sox in the Series.


One last thing - have you ever watched shows like Biggest Loser or Survivor and they have these really dramatic moments where people tell them how much they miss their family and don't know if they can't go on?  Last time I checked, on those shows they are only about 30-45 days long, you can leave at any time, your life is never really in danger and you are actually playing a game.  Quit Winjing!  (That is a British term for complaining).


All for now.